How Much is Too Much?

So I screwed up and read the letters to the editor in my old local rag this morning.  Someone compared the Boy Scouts' discrimination against homosexuals with the old laws that kept blacks from staying in white hotels or eating in white restaurants.  Someone else came in and said (this is verbatim) "Gays are nowhere close to being discriminated against to the same level that blacks were . . . ."

Okay, awkward sentence structure aside, WHAT THE HELL?  Seriously?  That's like saying, "Sure, apartheid sucks, but it's not nearly as bad as what the Ottomans did to the Armenians, so let's not even bother worrying about it" or, at its heart, "cutting off four fingers is a human rights violation, but cutting off one isn't (or surgically altering a girl's genitals is wrong but doing it to a boy is A-okay)."  Can't we just agree that telling someone they can't partake in something because of their sexual orientation (or their religious affiliation, hello again, Boy Scouts) is crap and we shouldn't condone it?  Regardless of how it might compare to some other bit of nastiness?

(click here to view)

John Cole
Scranton Times/TribuneFeb 10, 2013

EditorialCartoonists.com

 
Just ate up the last of the Farmer's Market jam.  Shared it with the boy.  Amazingly tasty, and incredibly not diabetic-friendly.  To my credit, we've had that little 8 oz jar for four months, so it's not like I've gone completely crazy on it.  It was superbly good, and I look forward to another jar lasting us four or more months.

Also in my old local newspaper, I found an advert for a "women's health center."  We used to live right next door to it, drove by it every day.  But I never realized who owned the place until today.

Warning--this is about to get a bit gory and "woman-y."

When I had my boy, almost 15 years ago, it was a mess.  My labor didn't progress, even though I started with water broken (and meconium in the water) and contractions strong and two minutes apart.  I labored unmedicated for over 30 hours, though, at 25 hours, my  labor began to falter.  Then came the pitocin for a few hours.  Still no joy-I never got beyond five centimeters, even though the boy was fully engaged and ready to go.   So I wound up in the OR.  Turned out our boy's head was in the 99th percentile, circumference-wise.  He was over 9 lbs and had a head like a pumpkin, whereas I have a very narrow set of hips. I could have labored 'til the cows came home, but he wouldn't have made it out.  Anyway, when they finally wheeled me down to the OR (with my half-assed epidural in place--NEVER again!), there were TWO doctors there.  My usual OB, a great guy whom I like a lot, and some other guy I'd never seen before.  We were introduced (won't say his name, since it's too late to sue for malpractice), and I was told he was a doctor from the Clinic, and he would be assisting.

"Assisting."  Is that what they call that now?  Guy did a number on me and how.  Four days postpartum, I noticed some bleeding from the incision--only the left side.  I called my doc, but he was out of town.  I was sent to this guy, since he had "assisted" in my c-section.  He looked, he gently tucked a little gauze into it, and he proclaimed it "fine until Dr. S gets back on Monday."

Except he was either stupid or lying.  It was actually NOT fine at ALL.  It was, in fact, ruptured all the way down to the suture line at the uterus, and a GIGANTIC hematoma had formed.  Let's be real--he couldn't possibly have NOT known that, but he sent me home for THREE DAYS with this because he didn't want to hassle with it.  Imagine my HORROR when I hobbled into my doc's office on Monday to have him sink his entire hand into that incision and drag out gobbets of blood like liver.

Sorry, too much information?

A week (?) or so later, when my doctor's nurse was removing the staples, she said, "Oh, my GOD, what a mess--who closed this?  I thought Doctor S. did your section?"  I told her, and she clammed right up.  Her face went still and careful and she said, "Yes.  Well, I could tell Dr. S. hadn't done this--his staples are always neat and pretty."

That's right, the "assisting" doc had done the closing.  And left me with crappy staples and a huge bleeder.  And then let it ride over the weekend because he didn't want to have to clean up his own mess.  I suppose I should be thankful--considering the quality of his care, imagine what he might have done to me, had he really put some effort into it.

I thought a friend was going to this clinic now (I'd heard her mention it before I knew the doc in question was there), but she just let me know she's not anymore.  Nor is her mom.  They don't like the guy.  Good.  No, I don't dare make it my life's work to warn the world, but I'm definitely going to warn my friends off.  I had no idea he was still active and in the area.  If I'd known, I'd have warned my friends sooner.

Since it's a lost food weekend, we're experimenting--I've been wanting Sambusa for weeks.  A friend who posted pictures a few days ago (she calls them "Samosas," which isn't uncommon, but it's odd to my ears because they've always been Sambusa to me) didn't help ease that craving.

Not quite our recipe, but certainly representative

We don't have it often, maybe once or twice a year, but when we do, we usually have it stuffed with hamburger, green onions, parsley, turmeric, cardamom, cumin (I learned it from the Arabic, so it's "kammun" not "kooomin" or "kyoomin"), and garlic.  It's a recipe I learned from an old friend of a friend named Aziz Al Howifi back in the very old days.  My ex, who was Palestinian, made a good Sambusa, too.   Anyway, I've gotten distracted.  My point was that we don't HAVE any regular hamburger, all we have is a batch of taco meat we cooked up and froze a few weeks ago.  So, we're having . . .

MEXICAN SAMBUSA!

Yeah, green onions, taco-spiced hamburger, with Mexican blend cheese and maybe sliced tomatoes (or just salsa).  A search online tells me that this would be called "Indo-Mexican Fusion-style."

Please.  I don't have that much fartsy in me.  It's just Sambusa made with Mexican spices.  Get real.

Going to have it with black beans and Spanish rice.  My mouth is actually watering!

After much debate, we've decided to nurse the back door along until after September--we're afraid the landlord might peg us pains-in-the-behind and decide not to renew the lease if we hit him with that before.  It's not that he doesn't know about it--I've emailed him about it (and he's responded that he would "try to get something done") and spoken to his handyman about it.  But he's already replaced the disposal and the dishwasher.  I'm afraid tossing the door in the mix would make him want less bothersome tenants.  So I want the new lease signed before we get serious about it.

We've got a plan for getting the debt paid down.  If nothing disastrous crops up (like THAT would ever happen), we can have all the credit cards paid off in a year-and-a-half, and ALL the debt, including car and student aid, paid off in two years.  We've already got two cards zeroed, with another (plus a store account) being paid off next month.  As each card gets paid off, we roll its payment into the next card's, increasing how much we're paying.

Of course, if the government puts my husband out of work for weeks because they're busy posturing and trying to poke at my President, all bets are off.  In fact, should that happen, we're sunk.

And that's about it.  I've spent the day cleaning (with help, thank you Hubby!), am feeling better about my world.  Last bathroom tomorrow, and then I can breathe.  Well, except I have to call the dermatologist and the gynecologist and the radiologist to make appointments for various things I don't want done.  Which sucks a lot of the air out of my world.

Do not reprint without permission. © KAQ

Degrees of Inhumanity

I've been reading a lot about the Pakistani girl who was shot for championing education for girls.  Thinking about how brave she is, and about how brave her family must be, to stand up in the face of such ass backwards violence.  I also came across the story of a young Afghani woman whose nose and ears were cut off because she "shamed" her husband's family.  Then I look at the poll of 21 countries around the world, asking who they would support for President of the United Stated of America.  All but one country supports our President, Barack Obama.

The one that doesn't?

Pakistan.

I find myself wondering where that line is?  You know, the line between "political differences" and "human rights violations."  In candidate Romney's camp, we have people who actively fight against wage equality.  THINK about that!  Romney surrounds himself with men who don't think it's important for women to be paid the same as men for the same work.  We have people in Romney's group who actively oppose making birth control easily and affordably available, even though we all know that improved access to birth control makes for fewer unplanned pregnancies, fewer abortions, and fewer welfare/housing/medicaid/food stamp claims.  Romney's camp has made no secret of the fact that it will cut student aid.  Who hurts the most when you put this all together?  Women, especially poorer women.  Pay them less, make college less attainable, limit their access to reliable, affordable health care, limit their access to affordable birth control.  Oh, and don't forget to remind them that issue borne of rape?  Is a "blessing," and it's all some deity's "plan." 

Are we there yet?  Seriously, how far does this have to go before we can agree that it represents a concerted attack on women and the gains they've made since the 1960s?  Remember, this is a party with members who support abolishing federal education mandates.  "Leave it to the states!"  How long before some backwards, backwoods holler decides that girls can stop going to school at 12 instead of 16?  That girls can marry at 12 instead of 16 or 18.  Hey, it's not a far stretch--Alabama already allows 14 year olds to marry, and many states allow girls to marry younger than boys.   

My son looked at me the other day and asked, "Is this how it all falls apart?  Will my daughters be allowed to vote?"

I don't know.  I'd like to laugh and say, "Hey, this is America, that's not ever going to happen."  But then I look around and I'm not so sure.  "Idiocracy" doesn't seem all that far-fetched anymore. 

So, Pakistan supports Mr . Romney.  I'm going to go with the more civilized places.  They're solidly in my President's camp.

Speaking of which, someone stole the firefighters next door's Obama/Biden sign.  Nice.

Anyway, that's all of that.  I don't tend to go too political here (I smear Facebook with that), but I was really stricken by the symbolism of Pakistan backing Romney.  I think it says something.

I won't even get started on corporations buying/establishing "scientific thinktanks" to challenge real science.  If you don't think that's ever happened, just look at the history of tobacco research.  And then look at climate change research.  Then follow the money.

Dang, I got started.  And now I'll stop.

Oh, real quick--looks like the weather's going to go on us in a big way.  Some talk of a hurricane meeting a cold front and producing an "epic" storm.  No telling if it will hit mid-Atlantic or farther north.  But it looks and feels like winter out there.  It's not cold, it's just a taste and a feel.  It looks grey, and it feels like it's not summer anymore.  I mowed, weed-et, filled the bird feeders, and put up the suet.  Not sure when I should overseed--when it's more reliably cold, I'm thinking? 

Even though it was 80 degrees this week, it tastes like it's going to go bad.  Gonna pick up some spare batteries and extra water this weekend.  Yay!

Looks grey.

One of the few pansies that made it to fall.

Crepe Myrtle--was in full bloom just last month, going autumnal today.

My mums tipped over.

The back--still needs work, but it was a weed lot with garbage strewn through last year.