Monday, September 9, 2013

Arizona's Leading Export?

I came across this disaster of stupidity today, thought for sure it had to be satire.  You know, like there's no way people could be this stupid?

And then I remembered Tara.

Tara used to hang out on a breastfeeding support board I frequented.  Tara was every single thing you fear in fundamentalist Christians.

Tara believed that Harry Potter was from the devil, that JK Rowling was an imp of Satan.  Tara believed the same of L. Frank Baum and the Wizard of Oz.  Toto?  More like Asmodeus.  

And Star Trek?  Oh!  Oh, the rant was perfectly crazy, with cries of "Satan!" and "aliens are demons!" and "the earth is only a few thousand years old and is the ONLY place that supports life! Other planets?  Put there by SATAN to sully our faith and tempt us from GAWD!"

I'm not exaggerating.  Tara homeschooled to keep her children from being exposed such evil ideas as dinosaurs (fossils are the work of Satan, created to fool us and make us doubt our creator), evolution (I don't even have to repeat the protestations there, do I?), and climate change (God will provide, and if God doesn't provide, it's because it's the END TIMES).  

In other words, she homeschooled for the exact opposite reason we do.

That Tara was also a chain-smoking, foul-mouthed creature who lived off aid from the government she despised (loudly and vociferously) and, according to folks who knew her personally, was churning out kids who couldn't read or write?  All the better, you know?  

After recalling dear Tara, I realize that maybe the Harry Potter-slaying thumper weirdos from Arizona are the real deal.  After all, Arizona gave us Joe Arpaio and Jan Brewer.  Makes these ladies seem like typical Arizona fare.

Found this in a clearinghouse of shots, but if Tara had something other than
a rusted out pick-up truck, it'd look just like this

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Tired of hearing the "Obama recklessly jumped for unilateral war in moments, while G.W. Bush carefully deliberated for months before making a decision backed by a coalition of world leaders" crap.  Um--one glaring issue here?  G.W. Bush spent months drumming up support (through the use of fabricated "intelligence") to attack a country that had nothing to do with 9/11 and had, until we blundered in, zero Al Qaeda presence.  So don't.  Be honest, admit it--no matter WHAT our President does, the right will condemn it.  If we go in, he's a warmonger, and if we hold back, he's a coward who coddles murderous dictators.  And, at its heart, it all boils down to this--he's the "liberal" (in as much as any politician is these days) black guy they didn't want to win.  And they will do whatever they can to obstruct and thwart the liberal black guy, not because they find his policies abhorrent (they LOVED "Obamacare" when Mitt Romney was pushing it), but because they find HIM abhorrent.  




Found this image on a lovely blog called "Don't Eat the Daisies."



And this one on a brilliant blog called "Sticking Points" on Souciant.com

Notice BOTH these trucks are from Arizona?  Sort of hearkens back to the first bit, huh?


Me?  I don't think there's any right answer, but I know this--anything that moves into the vacuum created by Assad's ouster will be at least as bad as Assad.  Probably worse, because it will have the nutbag fundamentalist contingent running the show.  We can either pick our poison or stay out and let the region settle itself.  And since we know we won't do the latter, and we know that Assad pisses us off with his refusal to butt-kiss, I'm guessing we'll take him down.  I don't like him, but that doesn't make taking him out a smart, good, or right thing to do.  Like I said, short of staying out of it, I don't think there IS a "right" thing to do, and I'm not sure staying out of it is RIGHT, either.  

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Obviously no news on might-be-cancer arm.  Won't be for almost a month.  I did find myself sitting alone in bed, completely losing cohesion.  I had something of an epiphany, though.  A double one, really, A seemingly mutually exclusive pair, yet somehow it works.

Oh, yeah, the thing?

It turns out that, when you're sitting on the bed, hugging a pillow while sobbing/chanting "I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm alright, I'm okay," you're probably not.  Regardless, doing that for 20 minutes?

Makes you feel a whole a lot better.

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And now, for a really bad name?  

Braxton Hicks.  I am not kidding, someone named their kid Braxton Hicks (that's first and middle). Do they think they're funny?  Do they think they're cute?  Is it some dim-witted inside joke? Because your child's name shouldn't be an inside joke.  My ex-roommate planned to name her son "Brock Lee."  Thought it was hilarious, insisted no one would "get it."  The only thing that saved him?  All of her friends ganged up on her and swore we'd never babysit if she did.  But I'd be lying if I said I didn't lose respect for her.  Sure, she changed her mind, but just that she considered it is enough to knock her down a few rungs.

Or it would be, if she weren't dead.  But that's another story.

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So here--have something ugly to cleanse the palate:




Clearly, I'm having formatting issues again.  It's beyond me, and I refuse to obsess.  Much.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for the shout out to my blog - I had Googled "Offensive Obama bumper stickers" and that is what I found. lol...

    Love your blog. If I were having anymore children (Oh dear god..NO!), I *might* consider Braxton Hicks for a name. Thanks for the chuckle! - Kirsten

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