Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Crazy is as the Virginia GOP Does

Came across an initially dumbfounding license plate/bumper sticker combination at Costco yesterday.  The bumper sticker?  A pro-Ken Cuccinelli thing.  And the license plate?

Proclaimed the vehicle owner a doula.

Just a mock-up for illustration purposes

Think about that--a woman who has dedicated her life to giving aid to women supporting a man who would do all he could to remove women's right to self-determination.  A man bent on restricting access to family planning, including common forms of birth control.  How sick is that?  Who on earth would want a doula who doesn't believe the women she's providing care to deserve to have the right to make decisions concerning their own bodies and reproductive functions?

But then I thought about it, and realized it's wicked-brilliant.  It is.  Ban abortion, restrict access to birth control, trap women into becoming pregnant and carrying to term and suddenly your potential consumer base explodes!  Elect Ken Cuccinelli and that doula is set for life!


Speaking of Cuccinelli (who is falling hard in the polls, please, please please), it's funny, watching the way money is being spent and lines being drawn.  There are plenty of McAuliffe placards about, but not so much in the rich neighborhoods.  A drive along Vint Hill or in certain Gainesville neighborhoods finds almost no McAuliffe signs and GIANT Cuccinelli signs--nearly billboard-sized, but on the lawns of McMansions and gentile horse-country estates.  Oh, and roadside gun stands:

Because nothing says "Cuccinelli" like a roadside gun stand.  Well, nothing except maybe this:

Speaking of the above, Cuccinelli's not the only guy running for Virginia office that scares the daylights out of intelligent women.  There's this guy:

Mark Obenshain.  A guy who is working his hardest to bluster through his utterly poisonous past oratory and his high ratings from such organizations as the NRA, the Family Foundation of Virginia, and the American Conservative Union.  This is a guy who actually proposed a law requiring women who suffered a "medically unattended" miscarriage to report it to THE POLICE (and hand over the "evidence") within 24 hours or risk a YEAR'S IMPRISONMENT.

No, I'm not making that up.  Here:

This guy, like Cuccinelli, also hates the sodomites, though he is a bit quieter about it.

And the third scary guy on the ballot next month?

The BISHOP E. W. Jackson

The Reverend/Biship/Preacher/Mr. Jackson has all the regressive, awful, terrifying, stupid ideas with NONE of the political savvy.  This guy isn't slick, he's embarrassing.  I want you to imagine the cognitive dissonance that must be raging amongst the ass-backwards conservatives of Virginia, who are overwhelmingly lock-down, old-time white, come election day.  Because this guy is a stereotype, and it's hard to imagine our hard-right, KKK crowd swinging this way, but the alternative is a dirty socialist/marxist/communist/fascist/libertard/card-carrying ACLU member.  Or something.  Here--have a taste of our good Bishop:

He sure does read those lines well, but he sounds like a fake, like they're someone else's words.

Mr./Reverend/Bishop Jackson has been running on a platform of, among other things**, bootstrap-tugging, claiming to have grown up destitute in foster homes so poor there was no indoor plumbing and they often went without food.  Yet look how he's pulled himself up!  Problem is, that's not true.  His fellow foster siblings, others who knew him and knew the family state that his stories aren't just embellished, they're fabricated.  

Oh, and according to the folks in the know?  Mr. Jackson was never the Chaplain for the Boston Red Sox, either.  Though he still makes that claim on his site.  

The republicans of Virginia did this to themselves--by choosing to bypass the electorate and select candidates via convention, they wound up with the most extremist bunch possible.  Because, as I've said before, the folks who are most vocal, most active pre-general election (when all the real decisions get made about who we'll get to choose from in November) are the crazies, the radicals, the Teapublicans.  And maybe, just this once, this extremism and subverting of the system by the right will serve the left, because these three candidates?

Appear to be tanking.  So yes, maybe, Virginia, there really is a Santa Clause.

**like anti-choice, anti-Obama, anti-democrat, anti-woman, anti-diversity, anti-Muslim, pro-Gawd, anti-YOGA, anti-federal disaster aid, anti-birth control, anti-sodomy, anti-gay things


Wow.  That't not at all where I'd intended to go today.  I was going to talk about bullies and gun laws and America's propensity toward damage control rather than prevention.

Ah, well.  Tomorrow's only a day away!

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